Dear Friend
The world is a scary, scary place, shadows cast everywhere, but I'm smiling like the light that cast them because yesterday was one of those days where it was Jessie (my guitar, if you need reminding) and I being beautiful together, playing softly in the background of my thoughts. I read The Fall of Five, and the new ghostwriter is pretty glorious, flew through another fivish episodes of Supernatural with Kellie, mostly learned this with Jessie:
*THE BLOODY FEELSALL OF THE THEM.*
Ugh.
I ate spicy chicken liver from Nando's and chips drowning in ketchup. It was just one of those nights.
I wrote of my wanderlust and these aren't the words but this is how it felt:
My eyelids are shivering there's a comb beside my feet there are bed sheets sprawled around me and outside there's a skyline I haven't memorized. I don't know any of these buildings, what is that red light flickering in the distance, why am I thinking of the construction sites nearby, what are they building? What am I building inside with my travels here, I have traveled here and I feel uprooted, my family's 3500 miles away, but my mind is on the other side of the galaxy today, it's not homesickness because I'm not sick, I feel so terrifyingly good that I don't know where I am and I want to know where I'm going, it's just the only thing I know is where I have come from and that's so backwards for me, I'm upside down but I guess the world's just built on being right side up so I better change my the range my understanding. I love talking about Saturday morning cartoons and books and worlds that I understand but never been to, like falling into a friend's arms, I understand you but I'll never really truly know you, do you know what it's like to want to get out of your own skin all the time, what's the point of ever being stuck to one point in time and space at all, I can't handle stillness and silence, they seem to steal things from me.
GAYYYYYYYYYYYYY
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